During my push for shared custody in the Family Courts for my daughters, I had to pay half for an assessment. This was no problem until well after I had the assessment and the assessment basically allowed me more time with my daughters, but did not allow me shared custody and took my joint custody from me. At first I was alright with it all. Until my oldest daughter informs (without prompting) that, and I quote, "Mommy made me tell the assessment guy what to say." My daughter feels guilty about this and I feel so bad because what kind of parent would do that. Well I know what kind of parent, but truly, how sad. My ex told my daughter that she needed to think about the family and her younger sister. All I ever told my girls when that day approached to speak with the assessor was to tell the truth. I understand why my eldest said what she said. For fear of her mother and what she would have to put up with if she didnt say what she was supposed to. It's almost a year and a half later and my eldest daughter asked me if she could send an email to one of the men she spoke to at children's aid. He had told her during an open file investigation of my ex that if my daughter ever needed to talk, to contact him. She said she can't make contact with him from her email address cause her mommy checks it all the time and she can't call. So she asked if I could help her make a second email address and then contact this worker. I helped her and supported her but at no time did I ever tell her what to say or do. I hope she gets the help she is looking for.
After spending the weekend at her mothers and on my next access date, she stated to my girlfriend (who told me later) that she understands why my dad is not with my mom anymore. I don't know how any man can be with that woman. This is from my daughters own mouth about her mother. I truly hope and pray that my daughter will be alright.
I can only imagine what my Family Court Order would have granted me had the assessment not been manipulated by my ex. Too late now. I think this will all come back and bite my ex in the ass. I guess they call that karma. We will see.
Sunday, March 4, 2012
Rules of Procedure
Well its been a long time since last I wrote. Since my last blog I have been to court various times for various reasons at various levels. I have been to the Landord and Tenant Tribunal, Small Claims Court, Family Courts as well as criminal. If I have ntoiced one thing that is inherant at all levels, is the complete disregard by those given the power to make decisions, to not hold those accountable who do not follow the rules of procedure or at the very least flaunt their total disregard for the procedures simply by attempting to circumvent these procedures, more specifically, not filing something within the prescribed time alloted or cancelling a date, only because they do not like the judge presiding that day.
I had no problem attending a court date to argue costs. Problem I had was that the date that was originally set, was cancelled by the other side, or so I thought, by simply hand delivering, on the night before court, a letter stating they were not pursuing costs at that time. Only to find out that the date went ahead without me and the other side simply scheduled a second date, with a judge that they preferred, to argue costs. The letter they hand delivered to me was completely different than the one they provided the courts indicating they were not pursuing costs. On top of that, the courts had origianlly forced the other side by serving them a Form 39, which simply put, means that if they do not schedule a date to argue costs within a prescribed time, then they could not make motion for costs. So they did schedule a date, only then to, at the last minute cancel it stating they were not going to pursue the matter, then getting that through the back door, bought themselves more time (they already had 9 months) and to in essence get the judge they wanted not the judge scheduled for that original date. I tried to hold them accountable via motion, but it was denied. So much for the Rules of Procedure. I think that for those who have the money, these are the games they can play because they can afford to play them. A lamen like me who has but a simple and perhaps a better grasp of law, just cannot afford to play these types of games. Courts tend to be a rich man's world. I try and will continue to try and hold those accountable when need be. But when you get decisions and those who flaunt the rules making the same decisions you will continue to get the same decisions. Until someone with power decides to make change, nothing will change.
I had no problem attending a court date to argue costs. Problem I had was that the date that was originally set, was cancelled by the other side, or so I thought, by simply hand delivering, on the night before court, a letter stating they were not pursuing costs at that time. Only to find out that the date went ahead without me and the other side simply scheduled a second date, with a judge that they preferred, to argue costs. The letter they hand delivered to me was completely different than the one they provided the courts indicating they were not pursuing costs. On top of that, the courts had origianlly forced the other side by serving them a Form 39, which simply put, means that if they do not schedule a date to argue costs within a prescribed time, then they could not make motion for costs. So they did schedule a date, only then to, at the last minute cancel it stating they were not going to pursue the matter, then getting that through the back door, bought themselves more time (they already had 9 months) and to in essence get the judge they wanted not the judge scheduled for that original date. I tried to hold them accountable via motion, but it was denied. So much for the Rules of Procedure. I think that for those who have the money, these are the games they can play because they can afford to play them. A lamen like me who has but a simple and perhaps a better grasp of law, just cannot afford to play these types of games. Courts tend to be a rich man's world. I try and will continue to try and hold those accountable when need be. But when you get decisions and those who flaunt the rules making the same decisions you will continue to get the same decisions. Until someone with power decides to make change, nothing will change.
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